Conventions, My Foot
by berryboom
Summary: "I win, and we start our sex life right away." Smiles. "I win, and we marry right away." Deal between old-fashioned and modern teens. [sasusaku]


**Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto.**

* * *

_Mess up with a good reason _(I have a good reason!)

_Too much fish in the sea so pick one _(I will, period.)

_Battle for your rights _(I won't give up!)

_Winners keepers _(Told you!)

_Beware of danger _(Didn't see that coming)

_Follow the rules _(My Foot)

* * *

**Conventions, My Foot**

_berryboom_

* * *

_**MessUpWithAGoodReason**_

_Wednesday 7.21p.m._

"_You_ have absolutely _no_ idea how much I hate you right now."

Haruno Sakura rolled her eyes. She was all but used to these threatening statements Sasuke made whenever she did something to get on his nerves, and in her opinion, it usually meant the opposite of what he said. So these tight moments were quite high on her to-do lists.

Except –

He did seem genuinely angry, his forehead creased into a hard line, his eyes dark and menacing, and his lips curled into a snarl. Literally like the Incredible Hulk gone mad, but of course there was no comparison with the looks.

Her response was dumb and uncaring. "Oh yeah?"

"Just _look_. Look at what you've _done_. To _my_ room."

She could see all right. The front wall was all painted with hearts and stars and graffiti, and in the middle was the hugest pink heart of all with "I heart Sakura 4ever" written. She also knew that she was the one who had scraped off the Uchiha Crest from that spot in order to show Sasuke his priority – My girl before the law.

"Well, its true, isn't it?" She gestured to the writing, a hopeful expression on her face. "You _do _love me." Despite all the hateful talk.

"Ugh, Sakura – That _so_ doesn't mean you have to go and smother my room like _that_!"

"I just wanted to show proof." There.

He ran a hand through his dark locks, frustration apparent in his features. He picked up the still dripping paintbrush on his feet and flung it across the room, so that it hit the graffitied wall with a splat.

"Grow up, Sakura! Just grow _up_, for heaven's sake."

...

...

...

_Wednesday 7.45 p.m__._

"Open the door Sakura."

"_Go away_!"

"I'm sorry." He repeated for the millionth time through his bathroom's locked door. "I shouldn't have yelled at you like that."

_I should have_, he corrected sourly in his head. But like always, he would clean up the mess Sakura made, like a gentleman, apologize to her when she was the one who should have been apologizing, and then go make out.

Why couldn't he have a normal life with Sakura?

"Why can't we have a normal life, Sasuke-kun?" She shouted from behind the door, her voice trembling and heavy with tears he was sure. "Just look at Neji and Tenten and all of them – I think even Naruto has it made with Hinata and we –"

"It was about that?" He should have known. Why else would Sakura go and get on his nerves like she was doing since she turned eighteen?

Ugh. He was a devoted Uchiha, and the rules stated all clearly: No sex before marriage.

So basically, Sakura was just sexually frustrated. Her mother didn't allow early marriage and she didn't fancy it either, so she was stuck with it, always on her peak at trying to force him into sex and earning his increasing defiance.

"Yes! And don't talk about it like its unimportant!"

He leaned his head against the door, and grunted. "What the hell am I supposed to do? You know conventions are for a reason. You don't want to sin first, do you?"

She jerked open the door and he narrowly managed to avoid ramming his head into the hallway wall. Her face was streaked with tears, her eyes pink and puffy, and her voice was guttural and more a growl when she said:

"I've had enough of this, Uchiha!"

No name? No suffix? That actually _hurt_.

"I'm going to bed."

Whew. Maybe she would feel better when she was well-rested. Maybe it was quite tiring to go and coat one of her boyfriend's room walls in three hours… For Sakura?

Maybe fish could talk.

* * *

_**TooMuchFishInTheSeaPickOne**_

_Wednesday 8.35 p.m._

The music from the dance club reached the group's ears as it hurtled through the glass doors, the teens laughing and clutching madly at each other. The blonde at the front grabbed his raven-haired girlfriend's hand and pushed into the scattered crowd of swaying bodies, namely Naruto and Hinata.

The rest of the group, tall and beautiful blonde Ino, dark-haired Shikamaru, the feminine-looking brunette you call Neji, his fiancée Tenten with the brown Chinese buns, chubby and big Choji, lively dark-haired Kiba and our very own Haruno Sakura with her loosely flying pink tresses followed behind, some of them making a beeline for the snacks/drinks bar and the others joining the rumba.

Sakura completely let go at such parties, and right now was exactly the case as she swayed and rocked to the beat, a drink clutched in one hand…Slowly, slowly she bopped her way to the stage along with the crowd, pulsing and shaking with the music and the urge to dance.

Sakura ground against any body she could find: she wasn't desperate or anything but it really felt good to let it all out.

Through the haze she noticed the black-haired cute boy on her side join her, bumping his ass with hers and slipping his arms around her slim waist. She let him and the other guy on her left and all of them danced through the night.

...

...

...

_Thursday 00.01 a.m__._

Sasuke tried the black gates and finding them open, entered. The lights were on in the living room and the upstairs hallway, judging from the windows, so he knew that someone was home.

He started to knock, but then just shrugged and pushed inside. He had been inside Sakura's house innumerable times, and since her parents were away for a few days, he decided to check up on her and return her crime tools (that is, the paintbrush and the paint boxes) along with a bouquet of flowers to brighten her sullen mood. He had already deposited the _tools_ inside her open garage.

He stepped inside the dimly lit living room, and found it empty, so he just climbed up the staircase to the upper floor where Sakura's room was. As soon as he set foot there, he found her closing the door to the bathroom. She was dressed in a white bathrobe.

"Sakura?"

She whirled around, her eyes wide and nervous as they connected with his. And then pink spread across her cheeks as she smiled at him, and he wasn't a fool to notice that it was forced. Nor that her happy expression seemed a bit overdone.

"Why, hello, Sasuke-kun!"

"It's quite late, isn't it?" he quirked an eyebrow.

"Uh…yeah, I know!" She spoke in a rush he instantly mistrusted. "I hung out with Ino and we just came back…Don't worry, I'm going to sleep now!"

"In a bathrobe?"

"I…unh…it's none of your business! Just leave!"

Sasuke sensed something really off in her attitude: she was acting weirder than usual. He took a step towards her, mystified. "Sakura, is everything –"

"– Is everything okay?"

His words were stolen by the incomer from Sakura's bedroom, dressed in nothing but white trousers. He looked dully surprised as he saw the befuddled Sasuke standing in the hallway, his eyes darting furiously from Sakura to him.

In a second the Uchiha was there, grabbing him by the throat and forcing him against the wall, knocking the breath out of the black-haired young man. Sakura shrieked in the background.

"_Sai_! No…Sasuke-kun, you're hurting him!"

He peered out of the corner of his eye as Sakura hurtled towards him, her bathrobe flapping around her, and her creamy white thighs poked through, indicating that she was wearing nothing, absolutely nothing. So that was what she meant by _"I'm going to bed_."

His hand left Sai's collar that he had been pulling tightly, and he growled at the pink-haired girl, flinging the bouquet of cherry blossoms on the marble floor.

"I think I'd better go," he heard the manly voice say.

"Okay…Sasuke-kun! Hey, wait….!"

He stormed out of the house.

* * *

_**BattleForYourRights**_

_Thursday 11.02 a.m__._

_**Thursday 11.02 a.m. **_

**To: My Delicious Prince Charming**

**From: The Perfect Chick Slash Princess**

**Subject: **_**TALK TO ME**_

Hey, Sasuke-Kun ''sup? :)

...

_**Thursday 11.08 a.m**_**. **

**To: Haruno Sakura**

**From: Uchiha Sasuke**

**Subject: **_**UGH**_

Leave me alone.

...

_**Thursday 11.10 a.m.**_

**To: My Delicious Prince Charming**

**From: The Perfect Chick Slash Princess**

**Subject: **_**NO**_

Is it about earlier? I'm so sorry Sasuke-kun I was totaled

...

_**Thursday 11. 15 a.m.**_

**To: Haruno Sakura**

**From: Uchiha Sasuke**

**Subject: **_**(No subject)**_

Yeah, right.

...

_**Thursday 11. 17 a.m. **_

**To: My Delicious Prince Charming**

**From: The Perfect Chick Slash Princess**

**Subject: **_**Don't you (no subject) me!**_

You have to believe me! We went partying last night and I guess I let go with all the drinking and when I got home Sai was with me I didn't know I brought him until you came I'm so sorry you had to see that

...

_**Thursday 11.22 a.m. **_

**To: Haruno Sakura**

**From: Uchiha Sasuke**

**Subject: **_**(No subject) again. Take that.**_

Yeah you're so sorry I had to see that and ruin your plans. Stop taking his stupid name and stop lying Sakura, I know you well.

...

_**Thursday 11. 26 a.m.**_

**To: My Delicious Prince Charming**

**From: The Perfect Chick Slash Princess**

**Subject: **_**Oh no, you did not**_

That's so mean! :O I didn't have any kind of plans

...

_**Thursday 11.33 a.m. **_

**To: Haruno Sakura**

**From: Uchiha Sasuke**

**Subject: **_**(No subject)**_

Oh please. Now would you just leave me alone and go resume your fuck sessions. I'm in computer class right now.

...

_**Thursday 11. 35 a.m.**_

**To: My Delicious Prince Charming**

**From: The Perfect Chick Slash Princess**

**Subject: **_**You're infuriating me!**_

WHAT sessions? D: Sasuke-kun what the hell maybe I meant that…okay I admit I meant that but I never did that thing with him! Not with him or anyone else! You've to believe me! :_(

...

_**Thursday 11.45 a.m. **_

**To: My Delicious Prince Charming**

**From: The Perfect Chick Slash Princess**

**Subject: **_**TALK TO ME **__**PLEASE**_

You love me don't you? :*

...

_**Thursday 11. 50 a.m. **_

**To: My Delicious Prince Charming**

**From: The Perfect Chick Slash Princess**

**Subject: **_**Hey am I talking to myself here?**_

You're supposed to say yes! You're supposed to accept my apology like a gentleman! And you're supposed to be my prince charming! :O

...

_**Thursday 11.54 a.m. **_

**To: My Delicious Prince Charming**

**From: The Perfect Chick Slash Princess**

**Subject: **_**You broke my heart**_

Sasuke-kun please talk to me please

Wait damn it open Facebook or msn on computer

...

_**Thursday 12.01 p.m.**_

**To: Haruno Sakura**

**From: Uchiha Sasuke**

**Subject: **_**does it feel good?**_

Maybe I will. And get this mess over once for all.

...

...

...

_Thursday 12. 15 p.m_.

**Today 12.15 p.m.**

**SeXy SaKuRa**: hey :)

**Uchiha Sasuke**:what's your problem?

**SeXy SaKuRa**: you're the one with a problem! :(

**Uchiha Sasuke**: and what is it

**SeXy SaKuRa**: you know exactly what

**Uchiha Sasuke**: what?

**Uchiha Sasuke**: that IS my problem but I've told you a million times rules are rules and I won't break them

**SeXy SaKuRa**: Sasuke it isn't a rule anymore! It's the 21st century!

**Uchiha Sasuke**: every adult would say I'm right and I'm sure your mother's the same: no sex before marrying!

**Uchiha Sasuke**: you pulled that paint stunt for this reason

**Uchiha Sasuke**: and then you did a bit of hocus pocus with your _beloved_ Sai for this reason too? You're unbelievable

**SeXy SaKuRa**: well I am unbelievable

**SeXy SaKuRa**: but I figured if you won't give me what I want then there's still so many guys out there!

**Uchiha Sasuke**: duh I'm replaceable?

**SeXy SaKuRa**: I have my own rights! It's a free country and if I don't get a THING at one shop obviously I'll go to another! You can't stop me!

**SeXy SaKuRa**: you shouldn't be the one to be mad, you should be apologizing, its your damn fault

**Uchiha Sasuke**: jeez what

**SeXy SaKuRa**: instead I try making up to you

**Uchiha Sasuke**: for the first time

**SeXy SaKuRa**: that's so wrong Sasuke I have my own rights!

**Uchiha Sasuke**: then win them

…

…

…

…

**Uchiha Sasuke**: Sakura?

**SeXy SaKuRa**: that's not actually a bad idea

**Uchiha Sasuke**: huh?

**SeXy SaKuRa**: You. Me. Arm wrestling. Tomorrow. At my house.

**Uchiha Sasuke**: LOL!

**SeXy SaKuRa**: I'll win it that way

**SeXy SaKuRa**: I win, and we start our sex life right away :)

**Uchiha Sasuke**: I win, and you marry me right away :)

**Uchiha Sasuke**: Deal?

…

…

…

…

**SeXy SaKuRa**: Deal.

**Uchiha Sasuke**: dream on

**Uchiha Sasuke**: I'll discuss the wedding arrangements as soon as I get home :P

**SeXy SaKuRa**: askjgryfdl WOMEN ARE STRONGER THAN MEN! WAAAAY STRONGER!

**Uchiha Sasuke**: Have you been working out in the gym?

**SeXy SaKuRa**: You bet.

* * *

_**WinnersKeepers**_

_Friday 5.00 p.m__. _

Sakura had spent her entire yesterday in the fitness center, then meditation and yoga as usual in the morning to maintain her calm. She was sure that on the other hand, Sasuke wouldn't need to do any dumb exercise; he was strong on his own.

She had to win! Her mother would _kill_ her if she rushed into early marriage.

She could barely contain herself as the bell rang downstairs and Sasuke stepped onto the threshold without invitation. She raced downstairs and skidded to a stop in front of him…and Naruto.

Sakura forgot her anxiety for a moment when she saw the cheerful young blonde, his arms behind his head, accompanying the Uchiha. "What are _you_ doing here, Naruto?"

"Good evening to you too, Sakura-chan."

"Yeah, whatever. Why?"

Sasuke answered for his best friend, his dark obsidians dancing with amusement and triumph. "He's here to witness as I beat you and then promise to make you my wife this week." He went past Sakura, smirking, into the kitchen-slash-dining room.

"You can do this, Sakura-chan!" Naruto said optimistically as he followed suit. "Your _desire_ is much better than his. And don't worry; I'm your good luck charm here."

...

...

...

_Friday 5.20 p.m__._

The look on Sakura's face was priceless as they sat across from each other on the table and his left hand grasped her right. She seemed really anxious and stressed out, and he was sure she was having second thoughts about this.

Naruto lounged in the rocking chair in the corner, eating noodles (which Sakura made him) and watching them intently in the golden evening light leaking into the kitchen from the windows.

The tension between them was on breaking point as his dark eyes stared into her apprehensive, emerald green ones.

Naruto counted off. "Three…two…ONE."

He saw Sakura's arm flex as she forced at his hand, but of course he was stronger, and his hand didn't budge. Her forehead bunched up in concentration, with beads of sweat appearing on them. Their hands stayed connected on the table, immobile, even though he could feel her fight against it.

He decided to play a bit.

For the next five minutes, the situation was the same, and Sasuke did not throw down her hand, which he could easily do.

Suddenly the hard line in her forehead vanished, and she stared down on the table instead of their clasped hands, like she had been doing.

Hallelujah. Perhaps she had come to her senses.

But he was disoriented as her lower lip trembled and clear drops seeped from the corners of her eyes. The tears trickled down her cheeks, catching the golden sparkle.

Crying on the battlefield?

Naruto started to stand up, worried and concerned as he saw Sakura's shoulders shake.

Sasuke had seen Sakura cry and wail and bawl lots of times, but this silent sob just pierced through anybody who glimpsed it. His hand itched to wipe her tears away.

"Sakura, you –"

Their arms slammed down on the table at Sakura's winning side.

"_What_?!"

Naruto started to hoot and cheer. "Ahaha, Sakura-chan! See the value of a good luck charm!"

"You _tricked_ me! That's cheating…"

"Stop acting like a kid Sasuke-kun!" She wiped away those phony tears and smirked at him, one hell of a devious smirk.

This girl had an _evil_ streak in her.

"I told you, women are _way_ stronger than men. We have many weapons," she grinned. "Tears are one of them."

"Men are helpless against that. At least, men with a heart!" Naruto added, and he scowled at him. Whose side was _he_ on? He was supposed to be the supportive, manly best friend!

Argh.

Losing, failing his chance to marry Sakura, and breaking the family's important rule.

Could this day get any worse?

"Ugh." He took a deep breath and glared daggers at both of them. Sakura seemed so keyed up she couldn't stand still.

Then she turned to Naruto. "Now take that ramen and get out. You don't need to witness _this._"

* * *

_**BewareofDanger**_

_Saturday 2.32 p.m__. _

Sakura was so blissful and hyper since her victory, she couldn't wait to get outside to her friends, especially Ino and have a girl talk with her. She had caught a couple of hours of restless sleep from seven to nine in the morning after her boyfriend left, had breakfast dreamily and then out to a hangout with her best friend.

When she came back, it was to find her mother Mebuki in the kitchen, sitting tautly in her favorite rocking chair. The house was spotless and clean, indicating that the maid had just left.

"_Namaste_," Sakura said, closing her palms together and bowing like an Indian. Then she added happily, "You're back! Where's Father?"

"He's out somewhere. Come have a seat, young lady."

Her mother's face was somber and serious as Sakura sat down in a chair, but she didn't let that spoil her happy mood. She was spending day two of the Most Wonderful Days of Haruno Sakura's Life.

Whatever she tried to do, thoughts and visions from the night before crawled into her mind, and she would relish again Sasuke's gentle strokes, his fierce but sweet kisses, their mixed scents all over the place, his hands trailing all over her body.

She was on the height of ecstasy that night.

So now when her mother's eyes flashed enigmatically at her and she slammed the small white box on the table, it took her a while to notice the stress.

Sakura looked down at the object. An _unused_ condom.

The one she had in her room for Sasuke, but she hadn't any _time_ for it, given her hurry.

"How do you explain this?"

"Erm…these are –"

"I know what these are!" Mebuki knocked her fist on the table angrily. "You might be thinking you're practicing safe sex, young lady, but you're dead wrong!"

"Yeesh, Mom, calm down," Sakura said hurriedly, backing away. "It's not like I used them or anything…"

Oops.

Her mother stopped in her tracks, her eyes widening.

"You didn't?"

Sakura chose it best not to reply.

"Sakura." Mebuki closed her eyes and took a deep breath, her hands clenched into tight fists. Her daughter's nervous eyes darted from her face to her hand swiftly to check for danger. Then her mother exploded. "_No sex before marriage_!"

"Mom –"

"You broke a rule!"

"Mom –"

"So I went today in your room to check up on the cleaning, and not only I find these stacks of condoms but also hair on the bed –"

Oops again.

"– I'm not a fool, I know you don't have dark hair, so how did they appear on your bed mixed with those pink tendrils? I just don't –"

"Mom I love him!"

Mebuki paused suspiciously.

"I love Sasuke, you know that! And I'm nearly nineteen for God's sake ; I can do whatever I want."

"You could just _marry_ him."

The world paused at that moment: the wind stopped blowing, the flying leaves became suspended in midair, the birds in the sky became motionless, the people outside froze in their work, all activity stopped, Sakura became a statue.

Only her mother breathed, in motion, anticipating Sakura's reaction.

Then it all resumed.

"MOTHER! _I THOUGHT YOU SAID NO EARLY MARRIAGE EITHER_!"

"You just said yourself that you're now older," Mebuki said, pouring water into a glass at the counter, her back to Sakura. "It was your _considerate_ father Kizashi who made up that rule for you. I was just the one who delivered it."

Father did?

Sakura was fuming. She didn't know who she was so angry at, but it wasn't her father. She followed all her mother's laws and everything because she was strict and… well, _scary_.

"Sasuke came by today…"

And the winner is…!

"…He was such a gentleman when he asked for your hand," Mebuki squealed, her sudden change of mood unnerving. "I would simply _love_ to have him as my son-in-law!"

* * *

_**FollowTheRules**_

_A week and a half later_

_Tuesday 12.00 p.m__._

Both of them gazed at the huge Uchiha mansion, white and covered with shining marble, with a beautiful meadow of flowers in the front, surrounded by evergreen flora with the view of the steadily flowing river behind. It was away from the noise and hustle of the town, in its own peaceful world.

In _their_ own peaceful world.

Sasuke lifted his "lawfully wedded" wife bridal style in his arms (him dressed in a pure white wedding suit and her in a beautiful dress of white satin, appropriately matching the house) and walked on the path of colored pebbles to the massive front door. Sakura looked away from his eyes and saw the inscription in black beside the door.

_Mr. and Mrs. Uchiha_

_HAPPILY MARRIED_

She had her sex life for only a day and he was going to have his married life, as the priest had put it, _till death do us part. _

So the real winner was the impossibly handsome, evil, conniving, sharper and tougher, conventions-following nut, _of course_, Uchiha Sasuke.

* * *

_**Prompts: "…You're worrying about conventions when we are past the end of the world?", lethal weapons, graffiti**_

**This was incredibly fun writing. You tell me why. **

**Reviews are encouraging. :)**

**berryboom. **


End file.
